Just Give In

By Amanda Pasciucco at Therapy by Amanda, LLC

About a month ago, someone was angry at me because they thought I had wronged them. I was unaware that they felt this way until the person came up and accused me of what I had done wrong. At this moment, I was so in shock of what had happened that I had nothing to say to them. They yelled at me and walked away. After this incident, I started getting extremely angry at the person for wrongly accusing me of something that I had never done. I thought about the situation over and over for days and I realized where the misinterpretation had come from. Now, I was in a predicament because I wasn’t sure how to go about telling this individual what had happened without starting more “drama.” Some people gave me advice but their advice seemed confrontational and did not actually solve the presenting problem. I was angry that I was being blamed for a mistake someone else had made and that this person who yelled at me was misdirecting their anger onto me. I knew that I did not want to confront this person with my own anger, but I could not seem to get my head around the appropriate way to handle this situation. Therefore, I reverted to one of my best advice resources… I called my dad. I explained the situation and he came up with the perfect solution.

Instead of taking my anger out and just adding more anger to an already “heated” situation, he decided that I just “bite the bullet” and take the blame for the situation which was not even my fault. Instead of adding to an already complicated situation, maybe it would be best for me to apologize, take the fault as if it were my own, and concede to the person who was upset at me. Upon hearing his advice, I was baffled. WHY WOULD I DO SUCH A THING?! However, after thinking about it, it really seemed like the best path to clearing the air so that we could continue with our lives and both of us could get over the anger we had towards each other. I followed his advice… and within a week, the problem was solved. I took the blame and this individual appreciated it so much that they took the time to actually apologize as well. I did not waste my energy explaining my side and yelling to create more anger, I simply accepted the false blame and we both moved on.

Tip of the Week: Just give in! For me, it was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. I wouldn’t get into a pattern of doing it, but for a person like me that frequently speaks my mind, just “letting it go” was the most amazing feeling and the perfect solution for this situation. This week, instead of getting upset over something, just let it go!